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My Recurring Dream
© Copyright 1997, Jim Loy
Reality
I had some worries about getting out of the army. I had to fill out forms, I
had to mail my stereo equipment home, I had to clean my rifle, I had to give
away things. I had to wait at the Danang airport for most of a day. When I
arrived at Cam Ranh Bay, there was an enemy attack. I had to stay awake all
night in a bunker, and watch flames in the distance. I started to wonder if I
would ever get out. When told to fill a bottle with urine, I couldn't do it.
And I flew from Cam Ranh to Tokyo to Anchorage to Fort Lewis, Washington. I
don't remember spending much time at Fort Lewis. Then I flew to Spokane, and
from there to Kalispell. I always worry that I will miss a flight (I did miss a
flight once in my life). And my parents drove me home to Columbia Falls.
Well, I occasionally dream of that.
Dreams
- I'm in Vietnam. And I can't get out of the army. I have to get rid of my
possessions, fly a Flying Fortress in an air race, and bowl in a tournament
first. I don't know if any of that would happen. I see a girl that I know. She
doesn't know when she will get to go home. She is holding back tears. Her
family is there. I share my popcorn with her.
- I'm getting out of the army. I take tests and fill out forms and turn in my
stuff. I eat and go to a movie. People are getting on planes. But I have to go
to the bathroom. There's no toilet paper. They've taken the key to my room, so
I can't go there. I am wearing a Smokey the Bear hat.
- I'm walking down a road in Vietnam. To my right is an army camp. There is
something that I have to do there, before I can continue down the road, and go
home. I walk into the camp. I wander around and do things. I'm not sure what I
have to do, or where I have to go. I wander around there forever.
- I'm trying to get out of the Army. A friend of mine is there. I hang around
a building a while, then I have to go down a path and answer questions at
various doors. There's a pretty blond girl who is answering questions ahead of
me. I want to talk to her. I'm confident that I can answer the questions faster
than she can, and catch up to her. She acts bewildered at each question, but
she answers all of them faster than I can. And I can never catch up with her. I
get to one door. Before they open it, they ask my name. I tell them my name.
They open the door, and say, "Word association: obeisant." I don't
know what obeisant means. I can't think of anything to say. They say that the
correct response is "Ronald Reagan". They tell me that no response is
supposed to show obsession. I tell them that I'll keep that in mind. We laugh.
I thank them and hurry on. The girl is gone.
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